Weight Loss Begins in the Mind

Not only was I fat, I was in poor health too.

Constantly fatigued, constipated through over-eating, with an aching knee to boot, housework almost left me dead!

The last time I was pregnant, I suffered sleep apnoea, the folds of fat around my neck playing tricks on me at night.

After the baby, I returned to pre-pregnancy weight.

But don’t congratulate me, I was still over weight!

I hated the way I looked and felt. In fact, I was disgusted.

Slim and athletic in my younger years, what had become of me now?

As I pondered my plight, I came to one conclusion – I had begun to “think fat”.

The only way to undo the damage was to re-learn “slim thinking.”

Years ago I had read extensively about health and fitness and had exercised daily. Consequently, I made informed decisions that led to a healthy lifestyle. This in turn manifested in being trim and healthy – the results of slim thinking.

Now I found myself eating “to support my large frame.”

I knew the benefits of exercise but, like most overweight people, I just “could not find the time.”

Typical “fat thinking.”

So, with renewed zeal (and heightened disgust at being fat), I read all I could find on weight loss. Over time this information was internalized. My thinking was put right and my habits changed accordingly.

Once again I was “thinking thin”, “doing thin” and therefore becoming thin.

It actually doesn’t work any other way.

You could diet all you wanted, and even start an exercise program.

But it’s quite unlikely that you’d keep it up, if you’re still thinking fat.

Your inner mental programming would always draw you back, to those detrimental fat-inducing habits, like a thermostat.

Without a renewed mind, you would not be able to sustain the commitment required to reach your goals.

This is perhaps why many people find it hard to stay on track.

Losing weight, and keeping it off, is hard work.

Your inner programming must first be changed, and then your actions, and consequently, your results, will be different.

Many people work on their actions in order to change their results. But as you can see, they’re missing the most vital step.

The battle against weight loss must begin in the mind.

A safe place to begin is with re-education.

Albert Einstein once said, “You can’t solve a problem with the same mind that created it.” You’ve got to change, or renew your mind on the issue.

I learned the way the body works at burning and storing calories.

What I needed was not some magic potion or some miracle Get Thin Quick scheme.

I needed to consume fewer calories, and burn more up.

I achieved this by gradually trimming down, or totally cutting out, unwholesome foods and cooking methods, and by taking up daily exercise.

It might surprise you to know that I lost most of the weight taking a daily thirty minute walk. Nothing fancy!

Of course there are still days when I don’t feel like it (today for instance!) but it has reached a point where I don’t listen to my feelings any more.

I pay attention to what I know: Burn calories, stay slim. Don’t burn them, get fat!

And I never, ever want to be fat again!

In summary, my mental re-programming revolves around five facts:

1) Being overweight or obese is a serious, life-threatening condition, not a mild aesthetic problem. We’re talking survival here. Many die from obesity-related conditions each year, so wake up! My major goal with weight loss is my health. Any other reason – to fit into a wedding dress, to get attention etc – is a short-term goal. And once you achieve such goals, you go back to Fatland. Survival, or self-preservation, is a life-long goal. The consequences of neglecting it are startling enough to get and keep your attention.

2) Your success with anything is up to you, including weight loss. You need to accept that, barring any medical conditions, or weight-gain-inducing medication, you are responsible for your weight. I had to be blunt with myself and accept that I over-ate and “under-moved” and this was why I gained the weight. The sooner you take responsibility for the problem, the easier you’ll adjust to responsibility for the solution.

3) While you don’t need a plan to gain weight, you definitely need one that works, to lose it! Unfair, isn’t it! Without a plan, any success will be temporary. When the hard times come, you’ll quit. With a plan, you know exactly what you need to do, when and how. You even have a back-up plan for if you slip up! And if ever the “Don’t-Feel-Like-It” days come, you don’t need to figure anything out, just get with the program! You’ll soon reach the days, like I have, when your feelings don’t have a say in the matter!

4) Healthy weight loss is gradual; after all, you didn’t put it on overnight. You need to run as fast as you can from any Get Thin Quick schemes, or magic potions claiming to melt the pounds before your eyes. These exist simply to part the gullible from their money. Whatever weight you lose with such schemes is most likely water-weight (which could leave you dangerously dehydrated), lean body mass and/or muscle, which you need to function properly. A healthy weight loss program targets body fat. This you should seek to lose gradually, as a drastic drop is unhealthy.

5) Losing weight, and keeping it off, isn’t going to be easy. The key to permanent weight loss is to keep burning up more calories than you consume. To achieve this you’ll need to make permanent lifestyle changes e.g. healthy eating and regular exercise. This is the healthy way to stay slim, and has many other health benefits, such as improving over-all health and giving a boost to your sex life (I can tell you that!)

Keeping these five facts in mind helps me stay on track, and continue to “think slim.”

I find that:

· if you re-educate your mind on the workings of weight loss and weight gain,

· if you settle it in your mind that you really do need to lose weight, and you can,

· if you determine that you will do whatever it takes to lose it,

you will have programmed your mind to co-operate with your body. You would have won half the battle, in your mind.

Then your inner programming causes you to do those things that shed the weight, and avoid those things that pile it on, even without thinking about it!

Much easier and more fun than all the fruitless striving you’ve been doing.

I found that I just did not want to eat certain high calorie foods any more. Previously, I could not do without them! And when my feelings say, “No exercising today,” my mind says, “Sorry, just do it.” And after I get started, I find that I’m enjoying it!

It’s something you need to try, to believe.

Paying the price will never be easy.

But no way would I give up my now healthy, agile body, or healthy energy levels.

Even my skin is taking on a shine!

No way would I ever go back to constipation and sleep apnoea.

I’ll be exercising and eating healthily for the rest of my life. And thinking slim! For me, it’s goodbye to fat FOR EVER!

Copyright 2005 Oma Edoja

This article may be reproduced, but only if left as is. It must also contain the author’s resource box and contact information below.

Oma Edoja is a published writer, motivational speaker and infopreneur. Having succeeded at weight loss she has packaged a number of resources to help those still in the fight! For help with your weight loss plan, and motivation to stick with it, please contact Oma at http://omaslounge.blogspot.com.
Remember, “You can’t solve a problem with the same mind that created it!”

Two Kinds of Love

Love is something we all need, and want. For love, some have lived, and many others have died.

Though the scriptures say it is more blessed to give than to receive, many of us are more concerned with receiving love than giving it.

Did you know that love could be proactive or reactive?

Let me explain:

Being proactive is to make things happen, rather than waiting for them to happen, to decide what you want and go after it, to decide what you don’t want and prevent it.

Proactive people take charge of their lives, assuming responsibility for their successes and failures. They are usually positive people.

On the other hand, being reactive is to wait for what we want to happen, complaining and responding negatively if it doesn’t. In fact, most reactive people never know what they really want in life. They seem to complain out of habit.

They blame everyone but themselves for whatever happens or doesn’t happen. And they are usually quite negative.

With these definitions in mind, it is easier to see how we could be reactive or proactive in love.

Proactive lovers decide to give unconditional love. They look for reasons to love, rather than reasons not to.

A proactive lover gives without expecting returns, forgives suffered wrongs, and keeps no record of hurts.

A reactive lover has quite a different agenda! His love has conditions. She keeps a journal of suffered wrongs. Their constant refrain is, “I did this because you did that.”

They don’t love you if you don’t call, or you’re late for a date. They complain about what you do, or don’t do for them - how you don’t make them happy anymore, you forgot a birthday or said something you shouldn’t have.

Proactive love gives. Reactive love takes.

One builds up, the other wears down.

One is a blessing, the other is a strain.

One is selfless, the other selfish.

In a proactive-love situation, you commit to keeping the fires of love burning, not expecting them to burn of their own accord.

You know it will not be easy. But because you care, you are ready to go the extra mile and do whatever it takes.

You believe in your partner, and you believe in love.

You know that love is not that tingling feeling, which comes and goes without notice. It is a commitment, through thick and thin, independent of your feelings.

Rather than wait to receive love, you give it first. And in selfless sowing you reap a harvest bigger than your seed.

God is Love. He is a proactive lover. “For God so loved the world that He gave His only Son…” His love is described in scripture as steadfast, everlasting, and tender.

We ought to love by God’s example. He loved us before we could appreciate it. He loves us, even though we sometimes throw it back in His face!

So here’s the moral in this article:

All things being equal, you are more likely to create the loving relationship you desire, by being a proactive lover. Even if your love is not returned, you would have sown seeds that will surely come back to you. Perhaps in the next relationship. And in all the ones you have at present, with neighbours, friends, family etc.

However, if reactive loving is your style, your negative seeds will sprout in every relationship you have, possibly causing a vicious cycle of failed relationships.

Remember the Law of Attraction, which is also stated as the Law of Sowing and Reaping. You get what you attract, you reap what you sow.

Regarding relationships, we could restate this law thus: Your relationship is the harvest of the seeds YOU have sown. Therefore, to change your relationship, you must start by changing YOU, not your partner!

If you want it better, become a better person. Be more considerate. Be more tolerant. Listen more. Criticize less. Give only what you would like to receive.

Your relationship is your responsibility. From its beginning you must be conscious of this fact. Whatever becomes of it is entirely between the parties involved.

Action Steps:

1. Decide what kind of relationship you want. What are your expectations for this relationship? I believe in discussing this with your partner so that hopes are not eventually dashed, and expectations are clear.

2. Make a list of the proactive things you could do to bring about the relationship you desire. Commit to doing these, even when the going gets tough. Remember, love is a commitment. It requires conscious effort.

3. Concern yourself with being a blessing. Give first what you would like to receive. Remember, you reap what you sow.

Brian Tracy says, “It is not the world outside you that dictates your circumstances or conditions. It is the world inside you that creates the conditions of your life”.

Remember, success is by design, and failure by default, even in love!

So, permit me to ask you: How do you love? Proactively or reactively?

What results are you achieving? Desirable or undesirable?

You can have the relationship you desire, but the onus is yours to make it happen.

Proactively.

Copyright 2005 Oma Edoja

Re-invent Yourself – 7 Steps to Becoming What You Want to Be!

Do you like your life the way it is? Would you like to change some, or all of it? Well, here’s good news: You can be whatever you want to be. You can re-invent yourself. I know because I did!

You may have a whole lifetime to undo or re-invent, but if you are determined, and ready to put in the effort, anything is possible. You can have a new you!

Here are 7 steps to a new, improved, re-invented you!

1) Make two detailed lists comprising: (a) all the things you like about yourself and want to keep, (b) all the things you don’t like about yourself and want to change. Examine both lists and ask yourself why you like what you like, and why you want to change what you want to change. Write out your answers as two separate statements. Keep these statements where you can see, and read them everyday.

2) Work on your “Want-to-Keep” list everyday. Keep on doing what you’ve been doing, and you’ll keep on getting what you’ve been getting! Also, work on your “Want-to-Change” list everyday, but in a different way. Take each item on this second list and re-state it as a goal. Remember your goals must be Specific (clear and unambiguous), Measurable (a specific weight, time, sum of money etc), Attainable (within your stated time frame and resources), Realistic (in your eyes) and Tangible (something you can perceive with your senses, not “imagine” with your mind!)

3) From your “Want-to-Change” list, identify your 3 most important goals, the ones that will make the most impact on your life, and bring about the new you. Write out a day-by-day, step-by-step plan for attaining each of these goals.

4) Identify possible pitfalls or obstacles to your plan. Set up contingency plans to circumvent these hurdles. Do not stop at them. No one can stop you but you.

5) Take action on your plan. Work those goals! Even a small step on your plan each day will move you closer to the new you! If you fall behind, or fall out altogether, just think of the lovely new life you stand to gain if you would just try. Imagine what it would look and feel like to be the new you. Know in your heart that it is possible, but it is also up to you. You owe it to yourself to get back up and on with the program. Only time, patience and action separate you from your goal.

6) Reward yourself for progress. Forgive yourself for slip-ups. Then move on. No time for Pity Parties!

7) Stay motivated. Think on your reasons for wanting to make the change. Visualize the outcome, vividly. Hang out with people who encourage you to keep at it. Stay away from negative people, at least till you “get there!” Read motivational books, employ a coach to help you stay on track. Enlist a supportive friend to rejoice with you at each success, and encourage you at each challenge.

That’s it! Re-inventing yourself will never be easy. You are going against patterns that may have been established for years. It will take determination, effort and patience, but it is possible, and will ultimately be rewarding.

I went through a process of re-invention a few years ago. I went from an overweight, unhealthy, plain-dressed, unfulfilled, job-holder, to a slim, trim, healthy, trendy, self-employed, fulfilled entrepreneur. Instead of holding a job, I now do my life’s work. I am working my own goals, and getting the results I desire. I am still not all that I want to be. But I am closer to my goals than to my starting point. No one will ever be “picture-perfect” in this life. But “fulfilled and satisfied” is the name of the game for me! And I sure am glad I had the courage to try.

People and circumstances will oppose you, saying, “It isn’t possible”, or, “Why can’t you just be satisfied with what you’ve got?” (The answer to that is, “Because I’m no ordinary person!”) But if you think your dreams are worth the effort, and you are willing to do what it takes, you can have whatever you want.

Dreams still do come true. And you don’t require a fairy god-mother! Setting and working your goals is how it happens in the real world. Be bold, take action and enjoy the new you!

Copyright 2005 Oma Edoja

This article may be reprinted, but only if left as is, and must include the author’s bio below.

Oma Edoja is a published writer, motivational speaker and infopreneur. She supports those trying to take their lives to the next level, helping them set goals and stay on track. Would you like to re-invent your life, or make just a small change? Oma is here to help you. She can be reached at proact04@yahoo.co.uk

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• Do you live in Lagos, Nigeria?
• Would you like a speaker at a parents' event/children's event/women's event/ even a men's event?

I'd be glad to speak at your gatherings, events, church meetings etc.
I speak mainly on motivational/inspirational, and parenting issues.
However I am versatile, and would do justice to the topic of your choice!


Why have me at your event?

Because I am

• humourous
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For Christian events

• I am a teacher of the word,
• a Christian motivator
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• Spirit-filled!

For women's events

• I am a woman in today's world
• dealing with today's issues
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For children's events

• I was once a child(!) and am now a mother, to an infant, a pubescent and a teenage child
• I'm a former schoolteacher, having taught kids in pre-school, primary, juniour and senior secondary schools
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For men's events

• I am dealing with many of the same issues as you are
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• Motivation and inspiration know no gender!

Creative ideas for an event:

It's your wedding anniversary and you're having a get-together.
Spice it up with an informal talk for your guests!
Topic could be inspirational, motivational, success-oriented, on parenting, or any of your choice.
And they would get to leave with one of my resource packs (a sample collection of my published articles and self-help exercises). We're taking party packs to a new level!

Same thing for:

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• Any kind of event where you want your guests to leave with a lasting, truly edifying gift (not just a full tummy and some clothes for dry-cleaning!).
  

Or, the graduating students at your (children's) school have finished exams and could do with something worthwhile to do for the rest of the term/semester.
Why not run a Life Skills workshop/Self-esteem workshop/Goal-setting workshop for them?


Contact me today for further enquiries.
Please email : proact04@yahoo.co.uk

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Stay well, stay positive!

Self-limiting Beliefs-The Inner Enemies of Progress

Let us examine self-limiting beliefs under the following sub-headings:

1) What are they?

2) How do they work?

3) What can I do about them?

4) Possible sources

5) A proactive approach

1) What are they?

Self-limiting beliefs are those things you believe about yourself that place limitations on your abilities.

They may be conscious or unconscious. They may be founded or unfounded e.g.:

I am fat and so no one will marry me, or,

I am not lucky; I won’t get the job.

That you are fat may well be true. That no one will marry you as a result definitely isn’t.

Some people prefer fat partners, and it’s the person inside that really makes the difference.

And luck isn’t the criterion for getting a job. You get jobs based on merit.

Limitations are actually a thing of the mind. In reality we have none.

You can do anything if you make up your mind to do it. Determination always finds a way around obstacles.

Henry Ford once said, “If you think you can…. or if you think you can’t…you’re right!”

It all depends on what you believe about yourself.

2) How do they work?

Our thoughts and beliefs colour our vision and perception of the world.

They determine our actions or inactions.

Thoughts affect feelings. Feelings affect behaviour. Behaviour produces results (or the lack of them).

It all begins with our thoughts, since we have to accept a thought for it to become a belief.

It’s been said that whatever you believe becomes your reality.

You do not believe what you see; rather you see what you already believe.

For this reason, two people facing the same situation may interpret it differently, act according to their different beliefs and experience different outcomes.

Self-limiting beliefs act like brakes on our progress.

They leave us acting forward, but believing backward.

They have been described as a malicious thermostat; you can take all the action you want, and in the right direction too.

But anytime you make progress, the thermostat pulls you back to conform to your inner negative programming.

Attempting to move forward when you have backward programming is like expecting a photocopy to be different from the original.

You’ve got to work on the original copy first, change the blue print, modify the DNA.

Your thoughts and beliefs are your programming. You cannot move beyond them.

To get out of the vicious cycle of acting forward but believing backward you’ve got to identify these malicious thermostats, and eliminate them, consciously and continuously.

Sometimes it’s a lifelong battle, but one that you can win each time.

3) What can I do about them?

Fortunately, you can get rid of self-limiting beliefs.

But first you have to identify them.

They could be lurking in the recesses of our minds without our awareness.

Talking with a friend or consulting with a coach could give you more objective feedback as to their existence.

Once you have identified them, these limiting beliefs must be challenged every time they rear their heads. You must consciously reject any thought or suggestion that you are limited in any way. There is nothing you cannot do. You simply need to find the way and follow it to conclusion.

When self-limiting thoughts are starved of attention, they wither and die.

Whatever you give attention to magnifies: whatever you do not attend to shrivels up and dies.

Jim Rohn says it aptly: “You cannot take the mild approach to the weeds in your mental garden. You have got to hate weeds enough to kill them. Weeds are not something you handle; weeds are something you devastate.”

No one is better than you are.

If others do better, it is simply because they have had more practise, more experience, and/or they know something that you don’t. And all this can be remedied.

God made us equal. It’s what we build upon His initial investment that makes the difference.

Read what the experts have said about our beliefs:

• Belief always precedes action.

-James Allen

(We won’t even attempt something unless we first believe we can accomplish it. No belief, no action, i.e. procrastination.)

• Within you right now is the power to do things you never dreamed possible. This power becomes available to you just as soon as you can change your beliefs.

-Maxwell Maltz

• Once your thoughts reflect what you genuinely want to be, the appropriate emotions and the consequent behaviour will flow automatically. Believe it and you will see it.

-Wayne Dyer

In a nut shell, you must control the thoughts that play around in your mind. Admit and nurture only those that enhance your positive programming and move you to your goals.

4) Possible sources

Limiting beliefs could come from the things people said to us and about us while we grew up.

Now is the time to devastate these weeds.

They could also come from listening to negative people, watching/listening to negative TV and radio programs, reading negative books and magazines, and repeatedly hearing negative song lyrics.

Always be on the look-out for possible sources, not fearfully, but with the attitude to detect and devastate them.

5) A proactive approach

A better way to deal with self-limiting thoughts is to prevent them in the first place.

Examining the list of sources above will give you an idea of where their opposites (self-empowering beliefs) can be found – in the opposite directions!

If you spend time with wholesome people and material, this will build healthy, wholesome thought patterns.

A mind that is girded with strong, empowering thoughts is in fit enough condition to resist invasion by these malicious, illegal aliens.

Invest in inspirational books, seminars, CDs etc. Engage in positive self-talk or affirmations.

And just in case they slip through unnoticed, perform periodic “mind-sanitation exercises” where you do some self-evaluation. Sometimes a seminar attendance or listening to an audio program is what will alert you of this incursion.

I wish you all the best as you build a strong and healthy mind.

Go forward and do all the things you thought you could not do, because now you know that you can.

Can I hear an “Amen” somebody?!

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Copyright © 2005 Oma Edoja

Oma Edoja is a published writer, motivational speaker and infopreneur. She speaks to, and coaches with people wanting to move to the next level. Is progress for you slow? Are results undesirable? Do you have self-limiting beliefs? Email Oma : proact04@yahoo.co.uk for a free assessment.

How to Take the Brakes Off Your Life and Move Forward

Do you find yourself striving upward in life yet making little or no progress?

Are you high on activity but low on achievement?

Very clearly, it’s time to stop, look and listen.

You’re obviously not doing something right.

I’ll share with you something that happened to me recently. I believe it will help you understand my point.

I am an “Advanced Learner” driver. By now I shouldn’t still be wearing my learner plates, I guess I just love the fact that people clear out of the way when I’m coming, and clamour to help me at the slightest sign of driver-distress. Talk about loving thy neighbour!

Any way, I was driving up a steep hill one bright Sunday morning when I noticed the car making some not-so-funny growling noises. Also, to my alarm, no matter how hard I stepped on the throttle, the car would not accelerate. It continued its belaboured, uphill climb, growling grudgingly as it went.

I made it some how to the top of the hill and pulled over to see what all the fuss was about.

As the smell of burning rubber reached my nose, my teenage son, sitting next to me exclaimed, “Mom, the hand brakes are on!”

I had been striving upward, making very little progress. I was “high on activity, but low on achievement.” Thank God it occurred to me to “stop, look and listen.”

I had the hand brakes on the whole time; the trouble was entirely my fault!

The strange part was that it took some one else to spot the problem.

It could have taken me ages, and much further damage, to see it myself.

Albert Einstein is reported to have said, “You can’t solve a problem with the same mind that created it.” Quite often in life we have the hand brakes on and don’t even know it.

When a little effort doesn’t give us the results we desire, we apply more of the same effort. We know something is wrong, we can even smell burning rubber.

But sadly, many of us just keep on “screeching on,” not taking time out for a re-think, and not asking anyone else for help.

The point I’m making is that when we apply ourselves as best we know how, and still do not get the results we desire, it should be obvious that “the best we know how” just isn’t good enough. We need to stop, look and listen. We might need outside help. Any further activity could cause even more damage.

These hand brakes quite often take the form of self-limiting beliefs.

We usually don’t know we have them.

But if we take the time out, with a trusted friend or coach, our words, actions, inactions and assumptions will quite likely reveal their existence.

A case in point: I have a friend who was not getting enough business contracts. She was qualified, capable and her prospects often gave her audience. She presented her business well and had a sound, desirable service to offer. But somehow, prospect-conversion rate remained low.

We talked, and after a while her problem became evident.

I could tell that she had self-doubt.

Because hers was a young, small business she felt intimidated by the older giants.

She felt she wasn’t as experienced and didn’t have impressive client lists like they did.

As a result, she approached mainly small business owners, who, though impressed, could not afford her fees. Occasionally she serviced larger clients, but that was when “a friend of a friend” gave her a referral.

When made aware of these limiting beliefs she admitted, though surprised, that it was true. It was as if scales had suddenly fallen off her eyes. She had no idea that she had self-doubt. She had re-examined her services, her presentation and everything else she could think of, to no avail.

In the end, I sent her off to a business consultant who helped her repackage her offerings and drew up a new marketing plan for her.

I took her through a series of coaching sessions to build self-belief and handle procrastination.

Today my friend has a sizeable, paying client base, and has learnt to stop often to look and listen when things don’t go as planned. She has also learnt to seek help.

Dear reader, is yours a case of struggle without success?

Have you taken time out to examine your case?

Remember, it isn’t likely that you will spot the problem yourself.

It’s probably your thinking that created it in the first place.

A trip to a consultant or coach might be just what you need.

He/she is more likely to see that your hand brakes are on than you are.

A coach is also better able to determine the nature of your hand brakes, as self-doubt is only one of them.

And with a network of other consultants, a coach can recommend the help you need.

Not being personally and emotionally involved, a coach’s opinion will most likely be objective.

He/she will not be critical of you but supportive.

There is no reason why you should continue with high activity and low achievement.

You owe it to yourself to stop, look and listen.

People today avail themselves of coaching and consulting for a variety of problems: business strategy, weight-loss, image-making, school work, career management—the list could go on.

Wherever progress is slow, or results are undesirable, a coach could save the day.

At the end of my ordeal with the hand brakes, my mechanic presented me with a hair-raising bill. I had burned my clutch plates, but thankfully they could be replaced.

Repairing the damage done to our lives or businesses might not be that easy.

We might never even get the chance.

Before the damage is extensive, stop, look and listen.

You just might need a coach to help you.

Copyright 2005 Oma Edoja
Article may be repreduced, but only as is, with author's resource box below.

Oma has since perfected her driving, dropping the designation "Advanced Learner," now bearing the prestigious title of "Licensed Driver!" Having been bitten once with her handbrakes and clutch plates, she is now twice vigilant!
For a limited time, Oma is offering free coaching to those seeking to clarify their goals, and needing motivation to stay on track with them. Email Oma today for a complimentary assessment: proact04@yahoo.co.uk We just might discover a few handbrakes!

I Can!

Let's take a lesson from Picasso!

I am always doing things I can't do, that's how I get to do them.
-Picasso

Have you said, "I can't", lately?
"Can't" means "not able to", "not having the necessary means, skill, authority or know-how, to do something."

Is this really true of your situation? Do you really and truly lack what it takes?
Would a few more attempts, some extra training, or a little more self-esteem, change the picture?

Whether you can, or you can't, is really a thing of the mind.
If you set your mind to it, there's really nothing you can't do.
Limitations exist only in the mind; in reality, there are none.

I 'm reminded of some of the "can'ts" of my life that have now become "cans" : riding a bycicle, driving a car, surfing the net, using a computer, even birthing a baby!
They each looked impossible at the time, but with strong determination, and sometimes, no way out ("Madam, you've got to push!), each task was eventually accomplished, and repeated several times over.

To be an achiever, it's important to keep on taking on new challenges.
Don't run away from them.
Never say never, as the saying goes.
Even if no one has ever done it before, there can always be a first time, and it could always be you!

Like Picasso, you've got to keep on doing the things you thought you could not do.
Push yourself to your furthest limits; you never know till you try.
That's how you'll turn your "can'ts" into "cans."
And hopefully, it'll become a lifestyle!


Think on this!
If you were required to prove in a court of law that you really cannot do the things you say you can't, would you have sufficient evidence to prove this, or would you simply have a pile of excuses?

Copyright 2005 Oma Edoja

A Lesson on Focus

This is an exerpt from my client-support resources.
It deals with the importance of Focus in pursuing your goals.

Read and enjoy!

The hunter in pursuit of an elephant does not stop to throw stones at birds.
-Ugandan Proverb

Ridiculous as this may seem, many of us stop to "throw stones at birds", forgetting the elephant we are hunting.

We may only remember our mission as the sun begins to set.

Then we make frantic efforts to find our game, all the while blaming the birds for distracting us!

We must always keep our eyes on our goals, the elephants.

Reviewing them, and our action plan daily, will help maintain focus.

Identifying possible distractions at the planning stage will help us avoid them, or deal with them if they are inevitable.

However, if you do get distracted, don't blame it on the "birds!"

Questions/ Action Points:

1) What are your goals for today? Keep a written copy on hand.

2) List possible "birds" and ways to avoid them.

3) Clearly define your "elephants" and the steps for "catching" them.

4) These steps are your action plan.
Ignore the birds. If possible, get a friend to support you as you work your plan towards your goals. He/she might recognize the "birds" before you do, and sound the warning bell.

Affirmation:

I will stay focused on my goals. I will take a step everyday on my plan. I will not be distracted from pursuing my dreams.


Copyright 2005 Oma Edoja